People Need People

Today’s day one in my happiness project, which means I’ve been doing some research on relationships this morning. I knew this one was going to be a little more challenging for me because I am a strong advocate for independence and our need for relationships can, at times, challenge that belief. It doesn’t have to though I’m starting to realize, in fact, maybe they go hand in hand? We can’t deny that historically, people do better in tribes and communities. We can take that even farther to say that we have evolved to keep healthy relationships over time, which is why they are so important today. Some people might challenge that and say no, in fact they don’t need anyone else to be happy. The fact of the matter is, when we lie down on our death bed we aren’t going to think about how much money we made or how many ribbons we won, we are going to think of how many lives we touched and who touched our very own. It’s only through relationships that we can make a lasting impact on other people’s lives and experience love, one of the most important and basic needs for humans. There have been hundreds of studies on the correlation between peoples relationships and their mental and physical health. In the end of these studies they found that people with strong positive relationships or pets in their lives had significantly stronger immune systems, less depression, as well as healthier and longer life spans then those without. In the end, even I have to concur that people need people.

 

I’ll be focusing on spending some time with my family and appreciating my friendships today while I’m doing some spring cleaning and homework and possibly talk about it later, I’d love to hear about your own experiences and thoughts on this. Thanks for reading! – Stray.

Is There A Science To Happiness?

 

I’ve been really interested in what makes people happy lately, in terms of making myself happy, bringing others happiness, and the science of what really makes people smile. Sure, we’re all incredibly diverse in our lifestyles and preferences, but I believe our happiness comes down to the same formula for all of us. I’m not the first one to stumble across this thought, upon visiting thepursuitofhappiness.org I found an article on “The Science Of Happiness.” The list is broken down into seven habits that make a person happy, the formula for internal contentment that I was searching for earlier includes:

1. Relationships –  People who have one or more close friendships are happier. It doesn’t seem to matter if we have a large network of close relationships or not. What seems to make a difference is if and how often we cooperate in activities and share our personal feelings with a friend or relative
2. Caring –  People who volunteer or simply care for others on a consistent basis seem to be happier and less depressed. Although “caring” can involve volunteering as part of an organized group or club, it can be as simple as reaching out to a colleague or classmate who looks lonely or is struggling with an issue
3. Exercise – Regular exercise has been associated with improved mental well-being and a lower incidence of depression.
4.Find your flow – If we are deeply involved in trying to reach a goal, or an activity that is challenging but well suited to our skills, we experience a joyful state called “flow.” 
5. Spirituality or Religion – Finding meaning. 
6. Strengths & Virtues – Studies by experts such as Martin Seligman in the new field of Positive Psychology show that the happiest people are those that have discovered their unique strengths (such as persistence and critical thinking) and virtues (such as humanity) and use those strengths and virtues for a purpose that is greater than their own personal goals.
7. Positive Mindset & Gratitude – Of all the areas studied in the relatively young field of positive psychology, gratitude has perhaps received the most attention. According to studies conducted by Martin Seligman grateful people have been shown to have greater positive emotion, a greater sense of belonging, and lower incidence of depression and stress.

The list they’ve provided makes enough sense, all the happy people I can think of definitely have lives that align with these values and goals. What really confuses me is how many unhappy people there are in America alone, let alone across the world, if it boils down to a simple seven step list like this? Before I can find an answer to explain our global unhappiness I need to start with myself, why am I unhappy and what can I do to change it? So starting tomorrow I’m going to spend a day or two focusing on one of the steps on the seven step list, and see just how accurate it really is.